Coffee. She was a complete moron. A walrus could do her job and would be more fun to look at. Quitting was the right thing to do. What the hell am I going to do now. I just signed a lease for a place I could only kinda afford when I HAD a job. Unemployment will help but will it cover the whole thing? This whole wedding thing is insane. So expensive. So wasteful. That kind of cash could solve so many other issues in our lives. “Why don't you draw something nice like butterflies or mermaids?” Oh that's what you want is it? You got it babe. Mermaids and butterflies coming right up. Let's get a pizza. Holy crap this pizza guy is huge! “Did you do those? They're awesome!” I did. Thanks. Here's a $4 tip. Gotta remember to draw something for the giant pizza guy. That was fun, but I can't spend $60 a week on canvas without a job. Maybe Walmart sells canvas. Wow, 11x14's for $2.99 each. Side-stapled, but do I really care? No. No I do not care. I'll take all you have. Today I'm going out to the city with my parents. Dad's gonna drive in. Taking the east side. CRASH! WHOA! YOU OKAY MOM? Everyone's fine. Even the golf clubs in the trunk. Is that guy speaking Korean? What the hell is he saying? I should look that up on the googles. Probably get all the wrong information that way. I could present it as fact anyway. No one would bother to check. I could probably write it in Russian and tell people it was Korean. No one fact checks art. There's nothing on TV but the news. The terror threat level is still at orange. A special committee is meeting in congress for sixty days to figure out if the threat level system is useful. I bet the threat level stays at orange for the entire sixty days. God damn useless. Michael Jackson...still dead...still don't care...there is nothing they can tell me that I'd be interested in....holy crap is his head on fire?!?!?! It is! The man's head is on fire and he's still dancing! Wow. The folks at Pepsi must love this. Hey weren't we supposed to get some government health-care around here? Must have been my imagination. I think I'll have a Pepsi and work on my diabetes. I bet the folks at Pepsi hate that. Let's work out. Where's that Wii Fit. It's measuring me. This is kinda surreal. I think I'll name my Wii Hal. Measuring... measuring... measuring.... YOU ARE OVERWEIGHT!! Great. Thanks for that. Where's my drink? What the hell is that music? Really? The bank is having another free concert? I'm a block away and eighteen stories up and I can hear them like they're in my god damn living room! Is that my phone? What the hell is this? It's not a txt or an email....its Facebook! Charlie Manson has called you his friend, do you confirm his friendship? What? Beep. E-mail. VIAGRA CIALIS PAXIL AVIDAIR VALTRX. THIS PILL SOLVES WHATEVER YOUR PROBLEM MAY BE! TAKE IT NOW NOW NOW NOW and never stop. May cause problems way worse than the one it solved....but we've got a pill for those new problems too. Gotta file this week's unemployment thing. What was that website again? Google. Unemployment. “Unemployment insurance is just a prepaid vacation for freeloaders.” This idiot won by the largest margin in American history. Nice legacy. Better than breaking a home run record with track marks across your ass from the juice you didn't know you were taking. If someone put something in my body, I'd be damn sure I knew what it was. What the hell is this thing stuck in my teeth? I didn't eat anything yellow. Hmmm. YIKES it’s Michael Vick! I hate the Eagles, and I’m not a fan of dog killers either…this union works with my sensibilities. YIKES, a bee! Swat! Dead. They say that the bees are disappearing and when they're gone, the world is going to end....I probably shouldn't have killed him....he was just going about his day. That was a mistake. Didn't I just read something about there being no mistakes? I better go work on that logo thing for the website...and the artist's statement too...I think I'll call it my manifesto. I like that better than statement. What the hell can I say about all this stuff? Isn't it clear that I'm just trying to combine aspects of Dada, Surrealism and Pop Art with the do it yourself mindset and attitude of punk rock, the anarchic, anything goes humor of Monty Python or the Marx Brothers, and a dash of the disjointed internal monologue of James Joyce? No one will get that. Maybe I should say some bullshit about how I feel that there are three basic types of art and while they can be intertwined within one work, one of the three usually dominates. Then I can ramble on pretentiously about beauty and documentary, vs, thought and idea and explain that I couldn't express myself through photography so I took to drawing. Stick something in about the sharpie on canvas idea being a way to simplify the process in order to get the process out of the way and I'm done. One artist's statement/manifesto...coming right up.….